It's time to love myself.

Update!

I got a lovely comment asking how my weight loss is going..........

I would have to report that it is not going. And neither is the exercising right now! Oi.

So, I got this lovely new job. Despite the fact that I get hit or spit on on a regular basis, I really seriously love my new job. I really missed working with kids and it's been so wonderful being around their wonderful energy and resilient nature. However the downfall of this job is this: cafeteria food and stress. Even if I bring lunch, I often find the cafeteria food more appealing. So what I've been doing is maintaining weight. My running has been helping with the maintaining and now that my allergies are more under control (acupuncture is amazing!) I'm hoping to start that up again. I'm trying to really work on my portion control of that cafeteria food.

So the maintaining is working, but the losing is not... The good news, however, is that I am happier. And as I adjust to my new schedule and the allergies, I should be able to start losing again.

I've been feeling retrospective about my goal that I made last Octoberish. I had hoped to lose 40 lbs by July 1st, which is about 2 weeks away. I've achieved about half of that goal and maintained it. For that I am very proud of myself! It took me longer than 9 months to put on this weight and it can take longer than 9 to take it all off! I'm not sure what my plan is yet... I really should start counting calories again but I'm not sure how that will work with food that I'm not preparing myself. I'll keep you updated!

Starlight Run - My first run!

Things I'm proud of:

• I signed up for a 5k!
• I went to said 5k
• I crossed that finish line covered in sweat and red faced.

The main thing I wish I'd done differently:

• Looked up the elevations of the run

I showed up at the high school at about 7 pm to get my number

for the race and to check out all the costumes. At 8 pm I got started about half way through the crowd of 3000 runners. It cleared out quite a bit fast than I thought and I was able to start pacing myself and not worrying about those around me. I did well for the 1st mile

or so, running the whole time including a block or two of uphill. Then as we continued into mile 2, I realized that the hill was not ending, that I was extremely hot (it was still in the 80's) and that I occasionally was feeling a little light headed.

I had been focusing on advice from soo many people! Thank you for the articles and the words of support, they helped so much and will continue to help. The one that stood out in this moment was the voicemail I got from my mom in the afternoon. She called to tell me how proud of me and to do my best but not to hurt myself. I hadn't even thought about the possibility of hurting myself because of all the running I'd been doing. Once I started trying to run the hills and not feeling well, there was my mom's voice in my head. Reminding me not to hurt myself. Reminding me that no matter what happens in this race, I have plenty to be proud of and that she will be proud of me.

So for the last mile and a half or so, I walked. My heart rate was still in the 170-180s which is where it's been during my flat runs. I ran here and there and I ran the last .2 miles or so, so I got to cross the finish line with pride. My time ended up being 45.48 according to my watch although I may not have stopped it immediately. This gives me a pace of about 14.67 minutes per mile, which for walking uphill for a lot of it doesn't seem too bad.

I'm ready to find my next race, and check how hilly it's going to be before I sign up so I can get a much faster new PR! :D

Sponsor me?

So, this is going to sound really silly.... bear with me.

I could use some extra motivation to continue working out and running. Signing up for a run sounds like a great way to do that. Even if I struggle to run the whole thing, I would guess that everyone around me running would help me keep going. So I was looking at the Starlight Run. Now that's only in a week and a half, but I'm close to being able to do a 5k. This means that I probably can do it, especially considering that running is supposedly 90% mental.

Anyhow, on to the silly part: It costs $15 (without the $13 souvenir shirt). I'm wondering if I could convince 7 friends or family to sponsor this effort with a couple dollars each. I know its a small amount of money, but our budget is tight and it's a last minute thing that would be hard to plan for. I may do it without the sponors, but I thought I'd see if any of you might be willing to help me out :).

I feel the need to again thank everyone who reads this and supports me and especially those who have told me they are inspired by me. It makes my efforts feel so much bigger than me and worth pushing on through! You guys rock!

EDIT: I'm signed up! The generosity of others amazes me! I'd better get my butt in gear!! Now I know you're really disappointed because you had two dollars in your hand ready to go :D. If you still want to be my sponsor, I would put your $2 towards the shirt or possibly even towards some new running shorts. 11 days! Keep a look out for pictures :).

Couch to 5K Week 6 Day 1

There are two different kinds of people (okay way more than that but bear with me). Those who can run fairly well naturally and those who can't. It takes hard work to learn how to run no matter which kind of person you are but it looks very different for each person.

I'm feeling frustrated. What makes it so much easier for some people?

For me, being able to run 20 minutes straight on Friday was a huge deal! And yet when I looked at my pace I lost a little bit of my excitement. Today I struggled to run for 8 minutes. When I tell more athletic friends of mine that I managed 8 minutes with pride in my voice, they try to act proud of me, but I can see that they are expecting a higher number. I don't even want to know what they would think if they saw how slow my "run" was.

The problem is, I don't really blame them. I am proud of myself. Don't get me wrong. I just wonder what it is that separates me from the natural born runners. When my husband talks about picking up running again, he talks about starting out at 15 minutes to start. What is it about my body that made even 60 seconds in the beginning so hard? Have I let myself get that out of shape or is it part of how I'm made? 5 minutes seems so short and yet it feels like such a challenge when I'm running it and such a victory when I finish it. It's only 5 minutes!

I'm going to continue on, but for those of you who feel me we can commiserate together. For those of you who run often or who have in the past, I would love any advice or insights!

More on Couch to 5k

So I just finished week 4! I can't believe that I'm doing this! I'm becoming a runner! I've read Roni over at Roni's Weigh talk and be incredulous about becoming a runner and I thought, no way. I am never running. I like my yoga and Wii Fit and walking uphill on a treadmill. Turns out I really like the idea of getting outside and getting an amazing workout in in 30 minutes. I also apparently like the idea of signing up for 5 and 10k runs, especially if they benefit a charity. So I'm doing this.

Week 4 looks like this: warm up walking for 5 minutes, then repeat this sequence 2 times: run for 3 minutes, walk for 90 seconds, run for 5 minutes and walk for 2.5 minutes.

For those of you who know me, or who feel like you can never ever run, know that running 5 minutes at a time is a big accomplishment! Week 1 involves running for 90 seconds only and I thought that about killed me! If you have any urge to do your workouts outside and succinctly, you can do it!

So here is the plan for tomorrow: finish mowing the lawn with our new reel mower (talk about a workout!) and try out Yoga for Runners. Who wants to bug me and guilt me tomorrow to make sure that I do these things? :)

Messing with the Blog

Just ignore the last couple things, I'm playing around with blog stuff.
On the fitness front, I'm getting really excited about running! I love the endorphin release, ego boost as well as the time in the sun! I've even begun to research organized 5 and 10k runs to sign up for! Wee! I don't even know who I am anymore :).